Archive for June, 2010

A Broken Man…

Posted in Cultural Education, Making fun of Dumbasses with tags , , , , on June 27, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

Married And Miserable…. – m4w – 35 (Financial District)


Date: 2010-06-23, 10:25PM EDT


I am living a nightmare, the nightmare called marriage. There is no way out for me only death.
She eats all day as I work. So she gained 75 lbs. Now we are beauty and the beast. I married the beast.
I am stuck in this situation and am so sorry that I did it. If I only listened to people who tried to stop me.
Now I go home each day to frankenstein.

I see hotties on the beach during the summer. I want to cry.
If you see a grown man crying on the beach, it is me. Don’t stare, just walk on by. The pain is so deep.

She snores all night as I fight for some peace. I sleep in the living room. I hear her get up in the middle of the night to eat once again.
Some day she will eat me. And eventually shit me out. I will be happy though as I flow down the sewer pipes into the bowles of hell where I belong.
I am a broken man who is miserable. Married and miserable.

  • it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1807921336

http://newyork.craigslist.org/mnh/mis/1807921336.html

A girlfriend of mine sent this to me last week, and after reading it I laughed so hard I was crying. I hope to goodness this is real, and not some random dude trying to get a sympathy lay for a fake issue, cause that’s not cool.

My advice to him:

1. Quit your b*tching. You deserve this for marrying a woman who would do that, and most likely there were signs foreshadowing this which you decided to ignore.

2. DIVORCE FRANKENSTEIN

3. Re-marry some young, sexy lil thing

4. Have your lawyer put together a pre-nup and have a clause stating that if she turns into Frankenstein before the age of 50, you’ll divorce her and she’ll get nothing.


My work here is done. NAMASTE.




The Shit People Send Me at Work

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , on June 22, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

lol

What I’m watching when I should be working:

(PS I am NOT a Trekkie. As a matter of fact, I HATE Trekkie’s)

Saturday June 19th 2010 (10am)

Posted in Cultural Education, Personal, Unique Encounters with tags , on June 22, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

Scene: Noho Star restaurant (Lafayette and Bleeker)

Activity: drinking my English Breakfast tea and reading my new book Shantaram

Next to me: A 7 year old girl and her mother

Their conversation I couldn’t ignore:

Mom: “I woke up alone this morning and forgot that I was married. I forgot who I was married to.”

Little Girl: “And then you remembered?” (only partially listening — much more interested in playing with her french toast)

Mom: “Then I came downstairs and remembered.”

[10 minutes later]

Little Girl [showing her mom a cut on her arm]: “Is it supposed to look like this?”

Mom: “Stop that, it’s freaking me out.”

Poor kid. Is the mom so lonely and/or desperate to talk to someone that she’s confiding in her 7 year old? What else does she tell her? When her daughter is sick and has blood in her urine, does her mom say “stop that, it’s freaking me out”? The woman might have been borderline nuts, but was most definitely self centered and pathetic.

I fought back the urge to snatch the kid away from her, look at her cut and tell her everything is ok.

But Besides Spanish Sausages…

Posted in Cultural Education, Just for fun, Reviews, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on June 11, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

I did discover EuroPop in Spain, which turns out, is pretty cool. Here is my new favorite song (new to me, though it came out and was a huge hit apparently in Spain and France in 2007) by a band called “Lucky Twice”. Basically, they’re hott Swedish girls who only got lucky once, as this was their only hit.

http://www.luckytwice.com/site.asp

(PS I’m showing a clip from Final Fantasy where they use the song, as the music video isn’t avail in the states on YouTube)

PPS: I listen to this every morning while walking to work….it’s invigorating 🙂

PPPS: I received a particularly delightful comment from one of my blog followers on my last Spain post, in an attempt to answer the question: why do the Spanish live longer considering their unhealthy lifestyles? She said:

“My theory: Spaniards healthy (low) stress levels + unhealthy nutrition > American’s healthy nutrition – unhealthy (high) stress levels.

My Point = I’ll take Spanish Sausage over American power any day. (That’s what she said).”

hahahahahahahahaha

(Lucky Twice pictured below)

About Spain

Posted in Personal, Reviews with tags , , , , , on June 11, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

“Un mysterio de Espana” : (translation) A mystery of Spain

This seems to be the answer for everything over there. Everything. For example: why does the Spanish population generally live longer, healthier lives than Americans when:

*they smoke: before, during, and after their pregnancies. I saw babies in strollers in bars. Everywhere. All the time.

*they live on a diet consisting of sangria, potatoes, sausage, ham, meatballs, sausage, chorizo (another kind of sausage), fried cheese, the occasional fried vegetable, and did I mention sausage?

*they drink every day, and all night.

*Gyms are completely absent. I don’t even know if there is a word for “gym” in Spanish…at least not the gyms I’m thinking (Crunch, Bally’s, Equinox, etc).

I asked my sister this question. My sister who has been living and studying in Madrid for the last 4 months…

Don’t get me wrong. I embraced the diet. For a whole week.

I LIVED ON SPANISH SAUSAGE FOR A WEEK.

(That’s what she said)

I’ve never felt so tired and unhealthy in my life…as a matter of fact, I’m pretty sure I’ve shortened my life span by 3-5 years.

Let’s just say, the sausage diet got real old, real fast (that’s also what she said). Now, back in Manhattan, I’m typing this while ecstatically sipping on my fresh-pressed beverage of celery, spinach, kale, and beet juice. For lunch, I had quinoa, brussel sprouts, broccoli, sweet potatoes, and baked chicken.

I’ve just started to return to normalcy….