Archive for February, 2010

I’m So Happy

Posted in Family Time, Sexy Time with tags , , , on February 27, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

That my parents moved to the East Coast, allowing their children to visit more often. Allowing for more family time–moments, like below, that I’ll cherish forever.

Mom: “Geeze Ash, you’re so white! You look like a prostitute.”

Me and Jack: “Whaaat?”

Mom: “You know, cause they only come out at night.”

Thanks Mom.

(Still trying to make the connection…)

(I’m working on my pale, like my girl Dita)

Advertisements

Tsunami Warning in Hawaii

Posted in Family Time, Personal with tags , , , , , on February 27, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

There was a tsunami warning issued in Hawaii this morning at 6am due to the earthquake in Chile.  My brother Christopher has been living in Honolulu for the last decade or so, now with his wife and 1 year old daughter.. Fortunately, Hawaii is pretty prepared for this sort of thing, and 50 ft waves are just another surf opportunity. The Irons brothers are probably securing a helicopter to be dropped in…

Regardless, we still worry. So Jack, Eric and I all call him (separately) to tell him some important things before the estimated time the tsunami will hit:

(me): You know how I said on Thursday that I hope a bird takes a big sh*t on your car? Ya…I didn’t mean it man. Also, I don’t want that to be the last thing I said to you.

(Jack):  “You know how I said you were adopted? I was just kidding man. You weren’t adopted. Also, the carpet you got blamed for burning when we were 10? That was me.”

(Chris: to Eric): “Do you have anything to confess?”

(Eric): “Ya: the last game of chess we played–I threw the game and let you win”

I want to be

Posted in Personal, Sexy Time with tags , , , on February 24, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

“kissed in a style that Clark Gable would admire” (The Postal Service)

Dongle Magnet

Posted in Sexy Time on February 24, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

Someone left another dongle in my conference room today.

Now I have two dongles.

Cause I’m a >>>>>>>>>>>

Brilliant

Posted in Genius Advertising on February 22, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

I want to high-five the agency that did this. Seriously.

I can’t stop laughing.

ChatRoulette

Posted in Cultural Education, Just for fun, Making fun of Dumbasses, Reviews with tags , , , , , , on February 21, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

This will either blow your mind, or creep you out. Or both.

Faithful blog followers, I’d like to introduce you to ChatRoulette.com. The latest craze to sweep cyberspace. It’s already been featured in New York magazine, the NY times, and Good Morning America. Think Skype but without your list of contacts. A website that allows you to connect to anyone via webcam instantly, all over the world, but only at random. There are no filters, no search field where you can select “females over 18 living in Manhattan.”

As you can imagine, for internet predators and pervs this website is like the Promised Land. According to various users, something like 1 in every 3 chat sessions involve a naked man jerking off.  One in particular (http://nymag.com/news/media/63663/) reported a man fornicating with a head of lettuce. You get the idea.

What was this 17 year old tech genius from Moscow thinking when he created such a site? What experience was he hoping to bestow upon us? I’m sure he had a romantic idea of how this tool could be used. A way to bring some humanity back to the internet I guess. A way to connect people.

I was both highly skeptical and VERY scared to try it. What if someone saw me and they didn’t think I was pretty enough? I’d have to watch them as they click the “next” button.

I have no desire to relive middle school.

The first time I tried it, I put my Clifford in front of the camera. Needless to say, people didn’t stay long enough to chat with me. The first guy I saw immediately disconnected, and the second dude was naked, of course. I screamed, slammed shut my laptop and went to sleep with Clifford in a headlock.

The second time I visited ChatRoulette I was a little more brave. Once I got past the naked masturbating dudes (yes, you get a little numb to cock when you see it every other time you hit “next”) the experience was actually really cool. I met a nice boy from Chile who was very charming–he told me he wanted to be born in my tears and die in my mouth. I think. Maybe I messed up the translation.

It’s definitely a male-dominated community. I only saw two girls during my whole experience, neither of which wanted to talk to me (sad face).

The only thing I wish the creator (Andrey Ternovskiy) http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/02/13/chatroulettes-founder-17-introduces-himself/?scp=1&sq=chatroulette&st=cse would add is some sort of translation tool. (Though you can clearly hear people, they don’t talk to you–instead everyone opts to type in the chat room, making a Google-translate type feature very easy to add). I never spoke to anyone from the States, and while I could get by with the Spanish speakers, I’m afraid I was less than successful with the French.

When I asked people why they used the website and what they were looking for, the general answer was “I dunno. I just wanted to talk to someone.”  In which case, Andrey’s website has succeeded in the sense that he wished.

Overall, I enjoyed the experience.  There’s something really exciting about it…the possibility that I could meet someone ridiculously cool, someone who will change my life. Not likely, but still possible. At the very least, ChatRoulette is something to do if you’re bored, or lonely and you just want to talk. Or if you enjoy watching others make jackasses of themselves.

<<<<(left: Chatroulette’s creator, Andrey. Right: the scary people that make up 2/3 rds of its users)

(http://nymag.com/news/media/63663/)

Cosi Observations

Posted in Cultural Education, Making fun of Dumbasses with tags , , , , on February 21, 2010 by indomitablyirresistible

2/21/10 Working on my laptop at Cosi on 8th st…

Observations:

1. The General Public is both stupid and disgusting. I just watched a man pick his nose, look at his finger, and then eat it.

2. I love watching PC people searching the place and cussing because there’s a serious lack of power outlets. Meanwhile, I’m in the middle of the room, I’ve been here for two hours and my little Mac is still at 70%. HA. Suckers.

3. There’s one person in this entire place with a Mac. He also has the same iced green tea beverage as me, thus making him the only person I’d consider talking to if given the opportunity.

4. The service at a big chain like Cosi’s sucks.

5. And the tables are dirty (refer back to observation #1)

6. The Postal Service can improve any situation, I’m convinced.

7. Lots of people eat by themselves. But most, because they are eating by themselves, have to be either on their cell phone or on their laptop. As if so others don’t feel bad for them…”oh it’s ok, they aren’t total losers. They’re still talking to someone…”

8. One of the bus boys is hopelessly in love with one of the cashier girls. Poor guy.

9. There are people who are genuinely interested in the artwork (?) at Cosi. Refer to observation #1.

10. The other patrons notice me starting at them, then typing away viciously on my sexy laptop. They’re probably thinking “I’m just being paranoid, she’s staring off into space, thinking while working. She’s not looking at me”. Actually, not only am I staring at you, but I’m writing about you too. Then, I’m publishing it.

(what I am seeing as I look around…sans the Mac guy)